Praise be for the Department Of Work and Pensions and benefit sanctions for they have made us see the light.
They have freed us from the wrongs of having things such as food in our bellies and warmth in our homes and have made us see that the vey basic things we need to survive are holding us back from our position in life which is to work all hours and for low pay and no pay to make the rich richer.
We must give thanks to them for removing us from food, warmth and clothing and for leading us down a road of poverty, starvation and eventually death in order to make us see the error of our feckless errant ways.
And we must thanks them for sending us to food banks and pay day loan companies by taking away our benefits. We should also give thanks to the pay day loan companies who have ever so charitably stepped in and filled our pockets with cash for free after our benefits have been stopped.
Thanks and praise to towards the work programme and the lords of workfare who have eradicated the poor and working classes from the misguided and if we might add utterly disgusting notion that a fair days work should result in a fair days pay.
Such ideas are out-dated and today held only be lefty socialist Marxists who live in Camden, read the Guardian and sip skinny lattés.
Thanks to the lords of workfare and the Daily Mail we can now see that it’s only well off middle class people with privileged backgrounds like Owen Jones who think that working people should actually be paid for their labour.
Praise be to all of them.
And finally praise be to Ian Duncan Smith for he will set us all free..free from food, free from warmth and ultimately free from living.
Thanks to him from the very bottom of our scrounger hearts.